I woke up feeling a bit frail and immediately got my feelings hurt when reading my morning email. I'm just not in the mood to hear anything less than kind and supportive these days. I'm too tired.

I did my daily errands on foot, hoping the sunshine and fresh air would get my mind off all the venom vapor around me.

My mother called to tell me she got the package I sent her last week... and to thank me for sending it. She giggled and giggled when she described seeing a picture of my niece Maggie that Philip took.

That package I sent to my mother contained some videos, some pix of her and my brother's kids... and some pix that my niece Maggie took herself. I asked mama what Maggie's reaction was when she saw her own photographic work. Mama answered that Maggie decribed her own photography as "beautiful"... and I totally agree.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, that's true. And neither beauty nor truth is subject to majority opinion. It doesn't matter if one or one million people like or dislike a work of art... because if even one person thinks something is beautiful, it must be... on some level. I tried very much to hold on to Maggie's simple self-analysis all day.

Jeff / Varla called to tell me that he might not be able to come back in late May. I might have to film the "pick up" scenes without him (these scenes contain just the Hassid from the "Jew Don't Know My Name" video).

I was too depressed to get much work done, but I did fill and mail out a few orders. I also read some of the book that Skitz gave me.

Philip and I ran out to THE PALACE THEATRE in Harahan to film a movie poster for one of Varla's vids... we got taco salads at Taco Bell on the way home.

Philip and I discussed how I've been feeling about dealing with people's thoughtless negativity and blatant cruelty. I feel so blessed to have Philip, who understands and is sympathetic. We may have even come up with a solution to our social disharmony and financial woes. I'll express more of that as it develops. But for now it is a goal that I will silently strive for.